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​Jigsaw

This song is by That 1 Guy and appears on the album The Moon Is Disgusting (2007).

Sharp as a razor blade
Sweet like toothpaste
Old like captain hook
Smooth like ice skates
New as a yugo
Wise like an Eskimo
Low like a mojo
Cheap like a garden hoe
Strange like a strange man
Cold like a frying pan
Still like an old shoe
Smelling like doggie doo
Acting like a zero
Feeling like a hero
Dumb like a doorknob
Dull like a dumb job

Cooking up my own feast
Cruising left due east
Holding up a lamp post
Full blown weenie roast
Stiff like new jeans
Jumping like jumping beans
Creeping like a spider
Lying like a liar
Drooling like a mad dog
Lost in the thick fog
Stack me a full deck
I'm lost aw heck
Gods in the pocket
Fingers in the socket
Got me a new look
Hanging from a meat hook
Bad like rotten meat
Hot like canned heat
Quick like fast feet
Driving from the back seat
Stray like an alley cat
Grungy like a doormat
Red like a stop sign
Bold like a shoe shine
High like a wino
Wide like a rhino
Bright like the sun shine
Pricking like a porcupine
Sticking with the program
Picking out the toe ham
Underneath the full moon
Made of cheese...

It will carve a perfect circle
It will cut through wood like butter
You know the grass
Is always greener
And the gravity grows stronger
The bark is getting bigger
And the bite is biting harder
The bread is growing moldy
And the weeds are growing taller...