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​Atheists Don't Have No Songs

This song is by Steve Martin and Steep Canyon Rangers, features Edie Brickell and appears on the album Live (2014).

Christians have their hymns and pages
(Hymns and pages)
Hava Nagilas for the Jews
(For the Jews)
Baptists have the Rock of Ages
(Rock of Ages)
Atheists just sing the blues

Romantics play Claire de Lune
(Claire de Lune)
Born against sing He is Risen
But no one ever wrote a tune
(Wrote a tune)
For godless existentialism

For atheists
There's no good news
They'll never sing
A song of faith

In their songs
They have a rule
The "he" is always lowercase
The "he" is always lowercase

Some folks sing a Bach cantata
(Bach cantata)
Lutherans get Christmas trees
Atheist songs add up to nada
(Up to nada)
But they do have Sundays free
Have Sundays free

Pentecostals sing, they sing to heaven
(Sing to heaven)
Coptics have the Books of Scrolls
Numerologists count, they count to seven
(Five six seven)
Atheists have rock and roll

For atheists
There's no good news
They'll never sing
A song of faith

In their songs
They have a rule
The "he" is always lowercase
The "he" is always lowercase

Atheists
Atheists
Atheists
Don't have no songs

Christians have their hymns and pages
(Hymns and pages)
Hava Nagilas for the Jews
(For the Jews)
Baptists have the Rock of Ages
(Rock of ages)
Atheists just sing the blues

Catholics dress up for mass
And listen to Gregorian chants
Atheists just take a pass
Watch football in their underpants
Watch football in their underpants

Atheists
Atheists
Atheists
Don't have no songs

Written by:

Steve Martin, Graham Sharp, Woody Platt