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The Shortest Distance Between Two Points Is A Straight Line

This song is by Simon Joyner and appears on the album Room Temperature (1993).

Your baby doesn't love you anymore
And I your friend have also reconsidered
I made her feel far more
Hey what are friends for
If you need to see either of us
Call this unlisted number
If you need to see either of us
Call first

Starvation is not the way to kick
Besides you could never make that diet stick
So go paint the town red
And find yourself a sterile bed
But please just don't surprise us
And if you find you need a friend
You can reach us anytime at all
By telephone

So did you get our christmas card
We hope you had a good one we went abroad
We saw the leaning tower
I swear man it's about to topple over
We saw a statue that reminded us
Of you somewhere in Europe
And if you feel like stopping by sometime
That's alright just give us a ring

The light bulb above your head has burned out
We hope that doesn't mean you're uninspired
All of your bright ideas are
Now suffering in the dark
She's the tar and I'm the feather in your cap
But I'm afraid we're both a bit under the weather right now
But if you can think of anything else you might need
Feel free to call