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​Peter Piper

This song is by Run-D.M.C. and appears on the album Raising Hell (1986) and on the album Funkmaster Flex Presents: The Mix Tape, Volume 1: 60 Minutes of Funk (1995).

This song has been sampled by Jimmy Fallon in the song "History Of Rap".
Now Peter Piper picked peppers, but Run rocked rhymes
Humpty Dumpty fell down, that's his hard time
Jack B. Nimble was nimble, and he was quick
But Jam Master cut faster, Jack's on Jay's dick
Now little Bo Peep cold lost her sheep
And Rip van Winkle fell the hell asleep
And Alice chillin' somewhere in Wonderland
Jack's serving Jill a bucket in his hand
And Jam Master Jay's making out our sound
The turntables might wobble but they won't fall down

Now Dr. Seuss and Mother Goose both did their thing
But Jam Master's gettin' loose and DMC's the king
'Cause he's the adult entertainer, child educator
Jam Master Jay, king of the crossfader
He's the better of the best, best believe he's the baddest
Perfect timin' when I'm climbin', I'm a rhymin' apparatus
Lotta guts, when he cuts, girls move their butts
His name is Jay, hear the play, he must be nuts
And on the mix, real quick, and I'd like to say
He's not Flash, but he's fast and his name is Jay

It goes a one, two, three and...

Jay's like King Midas, as I was told
Everything that he touched would turn to gold
He's the greatest of the great, get it straight he's great
Claim fame cause his name is known in every state
His name is Jay to see him play will make you say:
"God damn, that DJ made my day"
Like the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker
He's a maker, a breaker, and a title taker
Like the little old lady who lived in a shoe
If cuts were kids, he would beat you
I'm not lying, y'all, he's the best I know
And if I lie, my nose will grow
Like the little wooden boy named Pinocchio
And you all know how the story goes
Tricks are for kids he plays much gigs
He's the big bad wolf and you're the three pigs
He's the big bad wolf in your neighborhood
Not bad meaning bad, but bad meaning good

There it is...

We're Run-DMC, got a beef to settle
D's not Hansel, he's not Gretel
Jay's a winner, not a beginner
His pocket gets fat while others get thinner
J-J-Jump on Jay like cows jump moons
People chase Jay like dish and spoon
And like all fairy tales end
You'll see Jay again my friend