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​If They Could Only See Me Now

This song is by Robbie Fulks.

Well there never was a choice I made my folks could stand
From the clothes I wore to the rich girl that I gave my hand
And they stood against us all the way
Told me I'd regret the day I took that vow
Ummm... if they could only see me now

At a country club, like folks from the country never saw
I raised a glass of champagne to the new in-laws
And though mom and daddy were nowhere near
I could feel them staring cold and clear in the room somehow
Ummm... if they could only see me now

Well we bought our hilltop paradise in '95
You see the markets they were rising, and her dad sold high
And I look out past those gates of stone
To a shack of pig wheat overgrown, and I feel the plow
Ummm... if they could only see me now

All the cocaine, all the chartered planes
All the jewels, the furs
All the money you could dream of and it all was hers
And the way those people in town would stare
You could see they'd thought a moments care never creased my brow
Ummm... if they could only see me now

If they could see the nights that I sat with the kids
While she ran wild
If that could see a heart by riches warped
By love defiled
They'd see a calm untroubled mind
Is one thing all earthly gold combined could not emble
Ummm... if they could only see me now

Well it was 4:00am when they pulled in slow
With no headlights
There by the gates a last embrace and a kiss goodnight
No witness on that moonlight hill
But for one who stood alone and still
Neath the cyprus bow
Ummm... if they could only see me now

And she stared not understanding as I stepped in view
And I only meant to scare her with the knife I drew
Through the air above her chest it wove
And then if some power beyond me drove it down somehow
Ummm...

Now as a man who's born with empty hands
So he remains
She lies in a silk lined casket and I stand in chains
And to look upon those kids once more
But that's one thing the warden never will allow
Ummm... if they could only see me now