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This song is by Loudon Wainwright III and appears on the album Last Man On Earth (2001).

If they had to tell someone that something had happened
If they found me just lying there what could they do?
In case of an accident who could they notify
Would it be alright if they notified you?
I'm an unmarried orphan whose children have scattered
Estranged from my siblings close friends just a few
And of those few friends I consider you closest
They must contact someone
Could they contact you?
When they give you the bad news
I'm sure you won't snicker
You'll remember the good times and all we went through
Then I suppose that you'll tell all the others
Performing that awful task, someone has to
When they go through my wallet and fish out my license
They'll learn my D-O-B and my eyes were blue
As for my corneas, I don't care who gets them
All other organs and parts are for you

Written by:

Loudon Wainwright III