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Original (French)

Ron, le hockey c'est donc ben rendu plate
C'est donc pu comme dans l'temps d'Bronco Horvath
Ça drop le puck dans l'fond pis ça joue comme des chaudrons
En plus ça gagne cinq millions par saison
J'ai une question "totchée" pour toi mon Ron
Saurais tu où c'qui joue Gilbert Dionne?
Mon chum André m'a dit qui vivrait quecqu'part en Europe
Pis qu'y s'rait joueur-entraîneur comme Reggie Dunlop

À vos postes amateurs de sport
Et allumez vos radios d'char
Garrochez-vous su l'téléphone
Pour dire "Salut mon Ron!"
Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron!
Parce que personne
Mais personne
Ne peut te battre mon Ron!

Écoute mon Ron! Dis-moi si ça a d'l'allure
J'ai jonglé de t'ça à manufacture
J'te f'rais un méchant trade j'enverrais Brisebois à Dallas
Contre Dany Ross ou bedon Craig Vargas

{Parlé :}
Heu... salut mon Ron... etc...

Salut Ron mon vieux compagnon
J'te trouve ben blood pis ben d'adon
J'te félicite pour ton programme
Pis j'salue ta p'tite dame...
Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron!
Parce que personne
Mais personne
Ne peut te battre mon Ron!

Salut Ron! J'tournerai pas autour du pot
Y'a tu d'quoi d'plus plate qu'une game des Expos
En plus ça t'coûte huit piastres pour deux hot-dogs pis une orangeade
D'mande toi pas pourquoi y'a personne au stade
Mon Ron j'sais pas si tu vas me r'placer
On avait jasé y'a dix ans passés
Accotés su'a cantine du parc que j'me rappelle pu l'nom
Au tournoi d'balle des Chevaliers d'Colomb

Salut mon Ron mon vieux pirate
Avec toi on s'dilate la rate
On est une gang à t'écouter
Chez Carrosserie Gary
Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron!
Parce que personne
Mais personne
Ne peut te battre mon Ron!

{Parlé :} Salut Ronald... etc...

Hello, Ron!

Ron, hockey's became really boring
It's not like during the days of Bronco Horvath
They drop the puck and play poorly
And they're paid five million per season
I have a tough question for you, Ron
Would you know where Gilbert Dionne plays?
My friend André told me he was living somewhere in Europe
And that he's a player-trainer like Reggie Dunlop

To your stations sports fans
And turn on your car radios
Throw yourself on the phone
To say "Hello, Ron!"
Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron!
Because nobody
But nobody
Can beat you, Ron!

Listen Ron, tell me if this makes sense
I talked about this at the factory
Here's a wicked trade, I'll send Brisebois to Dallas
For Danny Ross or else Craig Vargas

{Spoken :}
Well... Hello Ron... listen, I'm a first-time caller, I'm a little nervous...
Listen Ronald, I'd like to talk about soccer, I'm a huge fan of soccer
You know, soccer in Montreal... Well, it's boring, Ron. I don't get it.

Hello Ron, my old companion
I think you're real nice and really cool
Congratulations for your show
And say hello to your old lady...
Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron!
Because nobody
But nobody
Can beat you, Ron!

Hello Ron, I won't beat around the bush
Is there anything more boring than an Expos' game?
It's eight bucks for two hotdogs and an orangeade
Don't ask yourself why there's no one at the stadium
Ron, I don't know if you remember me
We chatted more than ten years ago
At the food truck in a park that I can't remember the name
During the Knight of Columbus ball tournament

Hello Ron, my old matey
With you, we laugh a lot
We're a bunch listening to you
At Gary's auto-body
Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron!
Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron! Ron!
Because nobody
But nobody
Can beat you, Ron!

{Spoken :}
Hello Ron, do you remember in 86 when Mats Naslund scored on the Bruins' goalie - Bob Beers - during the fifth game of the Adams Division finals?
Did you know, Ron, that this guy never recovered?
I read his biography, Behind the Shadow, I advise you to buy it, a really nice lesson of courage.
Listen, the guy has been depressed for two years and had to retire in 1990 when he was playing, if I'm correct, for the Baltimore Skipjacks in the East Coast League, that's it.
Hey Ron, it's crazy, the guy was ran over by the team bus while his teammates locked him in his hockey bag.
Bad-lucked like that, it's impossible.
He's been ten years in a wheelchair, wore a pelvis cast for a year, now he walks with two canes and he's a bowling room manager in Saskatchewan.
Stories like that Ron, are giving me goosebumps, I had to share it with listeners.
At the same time, could you give me the results of the semi-pro league game between the Joliette Missions and the Blainville Badgers to know if Jean Perron finally ended his 41 consecutive losses drought.
Hello? Ron? Hello Ron?