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​The Waiter

This song is by David Baerwald and appears on the album Triage (1992).

Good evening sir and madam, I would like to introduce myself
I'll be your waiter and your friend for the evening
My only purpose is to serve and if I might observe
Madam is looking quite spectacular this evening
And if I might suggest the trout is very, very fresh
And the chef has taken pains with the sauces
And the pastries are divine and we have a special wine
Brought directly back from Paris by our bosses

Am I alone in this? Am I alone?...
I am your waiter and I am ordinary and I am the wildest in the world...
I am your waiter and I am ordinary and I hope you enjoy your evening

The specials tonight are the fresh fish and a radish
Directly from the farm and the harbor
Though I must recommend the oysters Hollandaise
I'm told it increases your ardor
The coffee tonight is the Brazilian espresso
The liqueur the Tia Maria
I'm in a spin, I'm swept, I'm asexual sundered
Split apart in sweeping fields of color

Am I alone in this? Am I alone?...
I am your waiter and I am ordinary and I am the wildest in the world...
I am your waiter and I am ordinary and I hope you enjoy your evening

Whole waiting
Waiting and whole...

The walls of the walls they flicker and fade
Soft and hard in a swift parade
In shining rooms sublimely made
I am a waiter

A shadow flickers a face sweeps by
Transparent in the shining window
I am recognized by a stranger
I am someone that they knew
They know someone that I was
I must be that someone
But I'm not the evidence denied
That someone is not I
I am a waiter

The boxer trains, the baby cries, the waiter waits
All boxers train, all babies cry, all waiters wait
In towers and gutters and soft sweet rooms
Eating takeout or escargot
Or drinking coffee from a paper cup
Or Chateau Rothschild from a crystal goblet

Am I alone in this? Am I alone?...
I am your waiter and I am ordinary and I am the wildest in the world...

Music by:

David Baerwald and Bill Bettrell

Lyrics by:

David Baerwald