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​Christ-mas

This song is by Cledus T. Judd and appears on the album Juddmental (1999).

This song is a parody of "This Kiss" by ​Faith Hill.
I don't want another fruitcake
I don't need another ugly tie... NO
Heard they had a sale on go karts
Down at Wal Mart
Ho ho a good buy
Got no money in my pocket
Can't believe it's Christmastime

It's the crowds that bug me
Stuck in traffic like this
It's kids causing a commotion
It's shop at your own risk

It's that Tickle Me Elmo
It's (dang) un-find-able

Christ-mas! Christ-mas
Un-shopp-able
Christ-mas! Christ-mas

It can make a feller uptight
I must have been to fifteen stores or more
All I wanted was a Light Brite
But they sold out last night... of course
Time I buy my kids a swing set
I'd be broke forevermore...

Tis the season of givin'
Tis that time of year
Twas the night before Christmas
Twas a pain in the rear
It's the credit card payment
Its (ah) un-payable...

Christ-mas! Christ-mas
Return-able
Christ-mas! Christ-mas

You'll see Santa hop the rooftops
Rudolph's nose will be glowin' so bright
There's a whole lot of parents losin' sleep
Nothin' silent about this night...

Oh, Christmas is pure promotion
Let us not forget why...
We're all out shoppin'
We're all out buyin'

It's the off-key caroling
Grandma's mistletoe kiss
It's that one string of light bulbs
You can never get lit
It's that gallon of egg nog
It's so (uh) undrinkable

Christ-mas! Christ-mas
Decorate-able
Christ-mas! Christ-mas

It's the things you buy me baby
It's the things I buy you darlin'...yeah
It's the crowds that bug me
Stuck in traffic like this
It's kids causing a commotion
It's shop at your own risk

It's that Faith Hill CD
They're all sold out-able

Christ-mas! Christ-mas
Beautiful
Christ-mas! Christ-mas

It's the things you buy me baby
It's the things I buy you darlin'...yeah