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​Odds Are

This song is by Christine Lavin and appears on the album Cold Pizza For Breakfast (2009).

The odds of winning the Mega Million Lottery are 175,000,000 to one
20,000,000 to one you will be canonized a saint
5,000,000 to one you will be scalded to death by hot water
2,000,000 to one you will be struck and killed by lightning
The odds are 200,000 to one an asteroid will destroy this planet
5,000 to one you will get a hole-in-one in golf
But when you hear the beep, that's your chance to speak
The odds are good that I will call you back

And just for fun, this is what happens when an automated translator
Translates it from English to Chinese and then back to English:

The Possibility Is Obtains from Kelisiting Lavin

1,000,001,000,000 times draws the possibility is 175,000,000 to one
20,000,000 to you just seals as the sage disciple
You will scald to the death from the hot water 5,000,000 to one
2,000,000 to you by lightning collision, and kills
The possibility will be the planetoid will destroy this planet 200,000 to one
5,000 to you will obtain the hole in one at golf's
Therefore, when you hear bye bye
That's your opportunity speech
The possibility will be is good I to tell you!