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Photo Finish

This song is by Chris LeDoux and appears on the album Rodeo Songs "Old & New" (1973).

At seven this morning I got on the phone
And said to hold my bronc as long as you can
My car broke down in Billings, and I just got it put together
I'll be photo finishing into old Cheyenne

Well here I am in Sheridan and it's nine o'clock
In the morning, and time's a-goin' fast
I just pulled her over, had some coffee and a doughnut
And I bought the car a brand new tank of gas

Well I don't know if I'm gonna make it
It's nine fifteen; I'll be luck if I ever get there
By God, now what's that I hear? Is it a si-reen?
Sure enough, he caught me on his radar

He pulled up behind me and turned on those flashing lights
A sign that I knew meant, "Pull her over"
So I stomped on my brakes, and as I skidded to a halt
I wiped out three reflector posts along the shoulder

He got out of his car and was a-walkin' real slow
So I jumped out and met him halfway
He jerked out his gun and said, "Mister, are you crazy?
I ain't never seen nobody drive that way"

I told him to take it easy, and he could put up that cannon
The way he's shakin', it just might go off
He put up the gun, as I explained my situation
He listened to my story, then he coughed

He wrote me out a ticket that seemed to take forever
I took it and as I headed for my car
That cop, he hollered out to me and said, "Hey, cowboy
You'd better slow down, 'cause you can't outrun this radar"

As I rolled down the road, I was a-cursin' and a-swearin'
About the ticket that I had just acquired
I wonder if I should pay for it, or throw it out the window
Lit a match and set the damn thing fire

So I gunned it once again, and was a travelin' down the road
With the gas pedal mashed to the floor
When I came around a curve, and right there in the highway
There's more darned sheep than I've ever seen before

I'm going too fast to ever stop, so I just closed my eyes
As the car roars on through the herd
When I open up my eyes again, there's a sheep on the fender
And that herder's sayin' some mighty awful words

The sweat's a drippin' off my hands as I barrel through ol' Wheatland
I'm a nervous wreck and I must be a site
The flies inside this car are buzzing all around me
Guess my 24 hour deodorant quit last night

Sixty-fifty-forty-thirty-twenty miles more
The rodeo starts in another eighteen minutes
I pull in through the main gate, and I hear the Anthem playing
I can't believe it, thank God I finally made it

There's only one more obstacle that's standing in my way
It's a nitwit with a weekend badge
He's standing by the gate, and as I slide her to a halt
He says, "Where in the hell you goin' so doggone fast?"

I tell him I'm entered, and I ain't got time to talk
My horse is in the chute and I'm late
He says I need to get a pass from the secretary
My eyes get red, my heart fills up with hate

I yell, "You dirty so-and-so, you'd better let me through"
He asked if I'd repeat that once again
So I wacked him in the mouth and then I left him lyin' there
On his back, a-kickin' in the sand

I got there just in time to see my bronc come running out
His head and tail was held way up high
I swear he looked right straight at me
Grinned and gave a horse laugh
And me, I just stood there and cried

I turned around feeling helpless and purely dumbfounded
I looked, and what did I see?
Three highway patrolmen, and a gateman with a fat lip
And they were all lookin' right at me

Sittin' in this cell now, I've done a lot of thinking
About that wild run I made a month ago
I'm sorry that I'm in this rotten situation
If I could do it again, I wouldn't have drove so slow!
If I could do it again, I wouldn't have drove so slow!


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