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Re-Educating Rita

This song is by Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine and appears on the album Worry Bomb (1995) and on the compilation album You Fat Bastard (2007).

We had one for sorrow, two for joy
Three for his old girl and four for the boys
Five for silver and six for gold
Then we lose control
So we leave his keys behind the bar
Because he's too drunk to drive his car
We're on the backseat of this taxi
And I don't know where the hell we are

But I wish you were here
Twisting my arm
And bending my ear

Whispering grass don't tell Therese
Sister Rantzen or her majesty's police
I'm terrified, intoxicated, starry eyed and bollock naked
Child bearing, adult rated
Thoroughly re-educated
And I wish you were here

We had one for sorrow, two for joy
Three for his old girl and four for the boys
Five for silver and six for gold
Then we lose control
So we leave his keys behind the bar
Because he's too drunk to drive his car
We're on the backseat of this taxi
And I don't know where the hell we are

But I wish you were here
Twisting my arm
And bending my ear