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This Cursed Blood

This song is by Anagnorisis and appears on the album Beyond All Light (2013).

All my failures begging for an end
These false promises becoming anchors
Drowning with the hopes of something real
Estranged to this person I've become
I feel contempt and diseased
Solidifying my hatred of forced existence
Pestilence pulses through my veins
Paralyzing me
It keeps me from draining it all

This place I dwell is a hollowed man
Boarded up and black with rot
I dream in better lights with less reflection
Shadows upon shadows cast inside

Like death masks piled on until there's no identity
I know there must be more to me

I raise my eyes upward, into the night
Into the darkness that existed before the light
Downward to death, the foundation of all life

Sigil marked for non-existence
This cursed blood can't kill what's already dead inside

It becomes misplaced to those I call friends
As I attempt to terraform this misery

Caustic is my nature
Eroding life around me
Self-hatred binds my will to change

As a lion let me drink from blood of your Christ
Awaiting salvation with open jaws
Shepherding hope into the belly of the beast
Digesting tired faith and shitting out lies

I don't deserve happiness
I haven't earned the right to self-peace
Preservation through malice is the irony
As I'm consumed with thoughts of death
When time comes
I'll enter my forest with no ribbon, just rope

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