I took her out, it was a Friday night
I wore cologne to get the feeling right
We started making out and she took off my pants
But then I turned on the TV

And that's about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you're twenty-three
And are still more amused by TV shows
What the hell is A.D.D.?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
What's my age again?

Then later on, on the drive home
I called her mom from a pay phone
I said I was the cops and your husband's in jail
This state looks down on sodomy

And that's about the time that bitch hung up on me
Nobody likes you when you're twenty-three
And are still more amused by prank phone calls
What the hell is call ID?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?
What's my age again?

And that's about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you're twenty-three
And you still act like you're in freshman year
What the hell is wrong with me?
My friends say I should act my age
What's my age again?

That's about the time that she broke up with me (please stay Wendy)
No one should take themselves so seriously (please stay Wendy)
With many years ahead to fall in line (please stay Wendy)
Why would you wish that on me?
I never want to act my age (please stay Wendy)
What's my age again?
What's my age again?

What's my age again?